SNL PENS D.C. DRUNKEN DEBACLE IN MAY 9 COLD OPEN, FEATURING PETE HEGSETH, BRETT KAVANAUGH, AND KASH PATEL
The May 9 episode of Saturday Night Live opened with a chaotic and irreverent cold open that quickly became a talking point online. Colin Jost reprised his role as a brash Pete Hegseth, now Secretary of War, navigating a dive bar in Washington, D.C., alongside host Matt Damon as Justice Brett Kavanaugh and Aziz Ansari returning as FBI Director Kash Patel.
Set at a fictional “Martin’s Tavern,” the sketch imagines the trio bonding over absurdities of power, war, and personal ego. The conversation opens with incredulity over Hegseth’s meteoric rise from Fox News weekend weatherman to commander of the U.S. military, a fact that visibly unnerves Kavanaugh.
“Hey, can I just say we are both kicking ass right now,” Kavanaugh says, referencing the week’s political chaos, including his role in dismantling the Voting Rights Act. Hegseth responds with a nonchalant “Dude, can you believe I just like started a war?” The banter escalates into absurd exaggerations about abortion, voting districts, and improbable blue chew scenarios, blending political satire with surreal humor.
The sketch quickly dives into alcohol-fueled chaos, with discussions of Hegseth’s invented drink, “The Reverse Irish Car Bomb,” and Patel’s custom bourbon bottles allegedly distributed within the FBI. Patel’s lines venture into comedic absurdity, claiming his girlfriend wants to open their relationship while he “stays in the living room,” highlighting the sketch’s trademark mix of current events and surreal exaggeration.
The sketch culminates with Kavanaugh joking that the Trump administration will continue indefinitely: “Trump found the original Constitution, and at the end, he wrote, ‘Psych!’ We’re gonna live forever!” The hyperbolic finale perfectly captures SNL’s approach to lampooning political figures by exaggerating personality traits and scandals to absurd extremes.
This isn’t Matt Damon’s first time playing Kavanaugh on SNL. He previously parodied the Supreme Court justice’s controversial Senate testimony in the 2018 Season 44 premiere, drawing on actual quotes and emphasizing belligerence and frequent yelling, often with beer in hand.
As the season nears its conclusion, the May 9 episode serves as a penultimate showcase of SNL’s signature brand of satirical chaos, combining political commentary, absurd humor, and a sharp critique of contemporary Washington culture. Damon, promoting his upcoming film The Odyssey, and musical guest Noah Kahan, round out an episode that balances commentary with entertainment, leaving viewers both laughing and reflecting on the surreal nature of modern politics.
Fans and critics alike have already hailed the cold open as a memorable display of SNL’s ability to fuse timely political satire with outrageous comedy, reinforcing the show’s reputation for skewering powerful figures with both wit and audacity.
